Rediscovering My Mo Jo Jo Jo!!!

As 2012 draws to a close, me along with many many others find ourselves in reflective mode.  Thinking about what was good, what was great and what was not so great and how in the world to make 2013 PHENOMENAL!!!  Sooooo, as I sat at work today it dawned on me that a phenomenal year begins with a single decision and that decision is to Rediscover My Mo Jo Jo Jo (yes I stole or borrowed this from a cartoon..you are not imagining things).

 I began to cruise my new favorite spot, Pinterest.com (somewhat of a minor addiction...there I admitted it).  That website has sooooooo many awesome quotes, beautiful homes, make-up ideas, fashion, health info and did I say quotes for EVERYTHING!  I was on overload reading about how to get back to my center: Zumba, meditation, journaling, waking up earlier (HA that was a funny moment), walking, running, drinking green tea daily, eating more protein, measuring and drinking more water, focusing on what brings you joy instead of what doesn't (great idea by the way), not allowing your past to be a stumbling block in your present etc.  I read, I repinned (which is what you do on Pinterest.Com when you see something you like...when you get curious enough and check it out...this will make a wee bit more sense).  I actually got kind of giddy and a little high off the idea of Rediscovering and Reconnecting to My Mo Jo Jo Jo (I have been saying this all day and man it was fun LOL..yes I am special).  After pumping all this great mental oxygen into my subdued conscious, I realized that I missed and I mean really missed what I had began back in August of 2012, which was walking consistently, taking pictures of nature while I was out walking, listening to my music (which I love to do), eating better and not too late.  I had more mental clarity and it felt good to take care of me. 

It is great to love and take care of others but if you do not make time and take time to take care of you...I can almost guarantee that you will run out of gas and find yourself stranded in more ways than you can begin to imagine.  Sooo, make yourself a committment to do you in a healthy way...Rediscover Your Mo Jo Jo Jo and make 2013 and every year there after Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious (yes this is from Mary Poppins and I just felt like saying it...it's fun)!!!

Concrete Visualization as a Tool 4 CHANGE!

If you are reading this post, you are probably searching for ways to improve yourself and the life you are living. If you are like most people, you have been less than fully successful in getting your goals to transition from dreams into reality.  You plan, you pray, you engage in positive self-talk, but still, the outcome that you've longed for never really bears fully evolved fruit.

If you are like most people, you are stuck in a script that you feel you didn't write!  Whether it's financial success, weight loss, or relationships, you just can't seem to break old patterns.  It's disheartening and frustrating and most of all, it feels like you are powerless to change despite your best efforts.

Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain
Guess what?  You are right.  You ARE following a script that you didn't write.  Well, not the conscious you.  Instead, the subconscious you, that YOU that makes up 90% of all your drives and motivations is caught in a loop and you know what's the worst part?  Your subconscious "YOU" doesn't speak English (or whatever your native tongue is).  As a matter of fact, your subconscious mind doesn't adhere to any written or verbalized forms of communication.  Your subconscious runs most of the routines of your life on what feels like autopilot.  Unfortunately, that means that you may be running some really self-defeating behaviors on that same loop.  Your subconscious is the man behind the curtain orchestrating your life.

Your subconscious speaks in SYMBOLS.  Symbols, pictures, and visions are the way that your subconscious speaks to you and that is the only way to "speak" change into your subconscious mind.


Did you know?

Recent studies have shown a "subconscious brain that is far more active, purposeful and independent than previously known."  Your subconscious is fully capable of running programs that are independent and quite contradictory to what your conscious desires are.  Actually, and I don't mean to offend, but your conscious mind is quite easy to trick and mislead, partially because of the drives of the subconscious.

The Conscious Mind                                       The Subconscious Mind
The conscious mind uses rational thought  / The subconscious processes symbols
The conscious is good at working out how to do things / The subconscious is good at doing things for you (skills and habits)
The conscious works hard at understanding things  / The subconscious doesn't care HOW something works, it will use the first thing it comes across irrespective of how well it works
The conscious mind is apt to waste time figuring things out for the sake of it  / *The subconscious will carry on doing things a certain way even when it is abundantly clear that it is not in your best interests.


How can you get in the driver's seat?

First, it is important that you dig deep to find WHAT is driving your subconscious mind's loop when it comes to a particular behavior.  An honest examination of the benefits that you get from the behavior is necessary.  For instance, an overeater may get comfort from consuming too much food as well as wearing their overweight as away to withdraw from society and feel safe in solitude.  No one can hurt you when you are alone so, although consciously this can be a lonely existence, the subconscious may actually promote this behavior as a method of protection.  Ask yourself powerful questions and step outside of yourself to examine your motivations.  I often say (as if I am not ME), "What does a person that engages in this behavior value?"


You may be surprised at what you find.


Next, you must begin to speak the language of your subconscious mind.  I call this Concrete Visualization, or using symbols and objects to speak directly to your subconscious.  Now, if you want to quickly and resoundingly get the attention of the man behind the curtain, you need to shout, not whisper.  Common methods of "visualization" may be effective, but can often take a long time to sink into your subconscious.  In my experience, the more senses you can engage and the more concrete you can make your visualization, the better.  Making your new vision is as simple as 1-2-3!

1. Identify the behavior/motive/value your want to change. 
2. Don't just envision the change.  Gather real items to symbolize the change.
3. Create a ritual to resolve the behavior and install the new program into your subconscious


How I used concrete visualization to heal myself...

After I discovered this method, I realized that I was sabotaging every romantic relationship based on a past heartbreak. I would avoid emotional intimacy at all cost, even though my conscious mind was craving a connection, my subconscious mind was protecting me by making me aloof and unattainable even though I thought I was available.  When I dug deep inside my memories I was surprised, when I bypassed the heartache that I thought was the issue and went all the way back to my childhood to a disappointment at the hands of my father.  That was the moment that I became unreachable and my heartache, as shattering as it was, didn't affect me as it might have someone who didn't have protective armor.  I knew what I had to do.  I got a small cardboard box and I closed my eyes and remembered being a little girl waiting on my father to arrive and that deep disappointment when he never showed up or called.  Once I had that feeling locked in, I opened my eyes and purposely gathered objects in my possession that I had collected from past relationships. These symbolized hurt and pain and a reminder that I needed to be protected from men because they would let me down.  I envisioned that each item was like a brick from a wall that I had built around my heart.  I drew pictures on pieces of paper; a lock and a key to symbolize opening myself to love and intimacy.  I was crying and laughing with joy as I felt the weight lift and I sealed that box and walked out of my apartment to the dumpster and, without further ceremony, pitched the box of hurt, shame, and self worth issues in the trash.  I was light, I was free, and my subconscious mind got the message.

I'm sorry this was so long, but I hope that you can use this information to take control of YOU.

Love and Light,
Adrienne

Sources and more reading:
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/07/31/health/psychology/31subl.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0
http://www.hypnosis-nlp-therapy.com/subconscious.html

Evolve (It'sTime 2 Go 2 the Next Level)

It's been a bit since I put fingers to keys, so I thought with this topic bouncing around in my head why not share.  This past weekend I enjoyed a Sunday out with some great young people and during our Sunday adventure a message was shared which deposited this in my spirit: When it is Your Time 2 go to the Next Level, you should be different than you were before.  Zipping in and out of daily life, setting goals, dreaming new dreams, and striving forever striving to go to greater heights we can easily get off track of where in the world we truly need to be heading in order to feel the most joy and peace.  We may begin to believe that our joy and peace will be found once we get this or achieve that and in deed this and/or that may contribute to them but they more often than not will not be the epitome of walking in our Divine Purpose (which it isn't normally where we will experience the most joy and peace).  We tend to have many obligations, people who depend on us, things we feel we MUST DO or the world will absolutely cease to go round (LOL..I am not the only one who has felt this way..be honest).  We somehow function this way for years, not realizing that the solution is many times challenging yet simple; Evolve, evolve, evolve!!! Give yourself not only permission but a charge to Evolve to the Next Level of your journey.  Stop holding yourself back by playing the same old film about your life up to this point in your head, over and over again.  You can either be your BIGGEST FAN or your most intense foe, it is up to you.  You can be your own cheering section, by being teachable and being willing to learn things that up to now you may have been hesitant or downright scared to learn.  As for me, I am learning my way around the kitchen (for those who know me..no smart comments or loud laughter and thanks in advance) and learning to ask for help when I need it which has been hard for me.  In this part of my journey it is amazing how God brings help from some of the most unexpected places and how the blessings flow abundantly on us when we step outside of our comfort zone and trust evolving will most DEFINATELY take us outside of our comfort zone so get ready.  That being said, we are not really living an abundant life if we are always comfy (sorry but it's true).  As we move out of our zones and start to blaze new paths, we will find we are evolving and becoming what we were destined to be.  The Awesomeness of this is that since no man is an island and in reality we really do all impact one another in some small way.  We all need each other to be fully who we are supposed to be, full of love, full of forgiveness, walking in our Divine Purpose, being teachable and being cheerful givers.  When we begin to truly live this way, we will look different, talk different, many times dress different, worship and praise different!!!

 So again let us rise up and  Evolve (It is indeed Time 2 Go 2 the Next Level)!!                      

Love is....

LOVE is an amazing force!  It heals, restores, gives hope, gives life, does not judge, forgives and comforts....but yet is simple and pure! Love wants the absolute best for each of us and is willing to Bomb our mental house if it is dysfunctional, dormant or unproductive. 

Love is an action word that INSPIRES us to Dream and to reconstruct our way of thinking, so that how we have been conditioned to believe and think (which unfortunately many times is not conducive to the ability to transform our dreams into reality) can evolve.  Love is that force that encourages and supports us to do the necessary mental work when we finally realize it is indeed time to regenerate our minds (the damaging and hindering way of thinking can be wiped out and rebuilt to be a LIMITLESS way of thinking).  Only then can we embark on and fully welcome the LIFE we were actually Born to Live, which is an EXCEPTIONAL and ABUNDANTLY ADVENTUROUS life!!! 

Are you ready to (Re)build YOUR Legacy?

In our daily pursuit of educational and financial success, what do we purpose in our minds to leave our children in regards to our legacy? Many times in our communities, our children grow up seeing their parents, older siblings, grandparents, and older relatives entertaining, spending way too much, not budgeting, arguing over petty things, gossiping, settling, and the like. We tend to have these hopes and hidden dreams that our children will somehow miraculously, in the midst of all of this, still grow up to be these phenominal, wealth building, faith having, well dressed, well rounded, sucessful individuals...even though we never REALLY gave them one of the main tools that would make all this possible.

"As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he" (Proverbs 23:7, kjv). This commonly used, powerful scripture, although quoted often, is more commonly used as a cliche' than a way of life. We desire to be apart of strong families, prosperous neighborhoods, integrated and supportive communities, but this is almost impossible with the mindsets that so many of us are living with today. In my thinking (and I did a lot of that today), i believe the very best thing we could ever do for our children would be to leave them a legacy of a different mindset. An enlightened mindset that realizes the power positive thinking and speaking has on the life it desires to create.  Understand that it is indeed true that what you consistently think and talk about, will eventually come about whether you want it to or not.

Let us start new traditions. Let us begin our days with our children, speaking LIFE over and to them.  Building them up with our words and teaching them to voice how they want their days to flow.  Encourage and teach them to pray for favor with their teachers, friends/fellow students, school work, sports and other activities.  Let us be verbally grateful for global mindsets and wisdom in our finances.

Now is the time for us to show our children how to experience genuine love, unshakeable faith (in God) and an intimate relationship with God, instead of being religious, or concerned about church as an institution.

So, my question to you is...Are you ready to (Re)build YOUR Legacy????

Heed The Warning and Just Answer The Call!!

Growing up, my beloved great grandmother (Sis. U.D. Shugart Bryant) kept her grandchildren as close to God and in church as much as she possibly could.  We went to Sunday School, morning service, evening service, prayer meetings, bible study, vacation bible school (faithfully EVERY SUMMER) and probably many other services that my special memory can not remember.  Being around what we call "Church Folk" or as my mother would say, "The Good Christians",  we heard and picked up many cliche statements.  Often we repeated these little sayings, having no clue of their meaning or even knowing if we really believed the words that were coming out of our mouths..LOL.  One of these statements was brought oh so gently to my mind tonight, so gently that although I would simply LOVE to be SLEEPING, here I sit typing until my lil' heart is content (can you hear the sarcasm?).  Many say" "Anyone can praise God but you must intimately know and dare I say love Him to Worship Him".  I have heard it, questioned it and kept it moving many times.  However, tonight as I listened intently to the words of a song (attempting to rehearse) that not so long ago I thought was for "Older Saints" it occurred to me that this statement was and still is so deeply true.  The song was "When The Saints Go To Worship" by Donald Lawrence.  Ok this may be your jam and that's ok, but you should know I am a little special (so don't judge me), ahhh moving on. 

The words came alive to me tonight and in just moments I was transported from an average mundane "I have to moment" to a small space where it was truly just my Heavenly Father and me, vibing (It was lovely).  What is really funny, or maybe not so much is that over the years God has impressed upon me to do many things and out of nervousness, fear and Lack of FAITH (yes yes yes I admit it...L.O.F) I was disobedient and did not move when He said sweet heart move this way or sing when He presented opportunites for me to sing or EVEN write when He generously gave me such eloquent words to write.  God does not change!!  If He wanted you to do it then, I would be willing to bet you some yummy Cold Stone Creamery Cheese Cake icecream that He STILL Wants YOU to Dust Yourself Off And DO IT NOW!!!  Something we need to know and remember about God is that to Him, our obedience is far better than our sacrifice (Thanks Bro. Howell you really brought this point home for me).  God knows that many things that will make our homes, childhoods, neighborhoods, work environments, relationships, finances, health and world better, can only be achieved when we step outside of our comfort zones, have real faith in Him (really believing that nothing is impossible to God and with God) and are obedient to His Divine promptings and instructions....  When the same message is coming to you loud and clear from what seems like EVERY direction, do yourself and those who need what has been placed in you a favor, Heed the Warning and Just Answer the Call!!!! 

"Free 2 Be"

Winds of Change Blowing

Mental Chains Being Broken!

We are Free 2 Be!

Don't Ever Lose Sight!

You know that feeling you get when you have a new project (completing your BA or PhD, a healthy & fulfillin relationship, saving for your dream car/home or much needed dream vacation, new work out class, embarking on your dream career etc)?  Think for a moment, just a moment about how passionate you are about it and how it consumes your every thought.  You think about how you can enjoy it, make it work, make it better, make it beautiful, make it a success by any means necessary!  That fire burns for that thing and we let NOTHING sidetrack us from the VISION of what we Desire it be!  Today is a gentle but firm reminder that if you have been given a Divine Vision for anything: your family, your education, your health, your children, your marriage, your finances, your career or anything in between....do whatever you need to do to keep that fire lit!! 

In the morning, in the noon day, in the evening:
*Pray About It
*Think About It
*Talk About It
*Write About It
*Shout About It
*Envision Yourself Living It
*Take Small Daily Steps Toward It
*Be Grateful For It
*Protect It
*Stay Excited About It
*Let Nothing and No One Separate You From It
*Truly Believe In It
*Believe If He Gave It then You Can Achieve It
*Be About It
And Don't Ever Lose Sight of Your Divine Vision, NEVER EVER EVER!!!!!

"Heirs of the King"

There is nothin' quite like a Brotha'.

His walk, his talk, his resilience and go get it attitude!  His determination to rise and fly above the dust of hopelessness.  His smile, his disappointments to his Victories.  His phenomenal and unmistakeable power to create and sustain amazing families.  Oh but if WE could only take the time to heal enough, in order to love them enough, to raise them enough, so they (from birth) could believe just enough that they are indeed "Sons of the King" who reigns on high, lives and destinies would forever be changed.  To deposit this truth, that they are soooo much more than the world and sometimes we make them out to be with our piercing, hurtful words and actions. 

We should take a stand and shout, not just with our words but with our daily actions: My Brother, you are Vitally Important to the well being of our communities, churches, schools, children and families!!!  Then they could with confidence take their rightful place as "Heirs of the King", fully embracing and embodying their royal legacy and rich heritage.  They would be in a far better position to prosper and not fade away one by one.  The world as we are now experiencing it, would be mo' betta' for it! 

Sometimes U Have to Choose U!!

This morning as I woke up, way to energized for it to have been legal, I was greeted with these powerful words from Phillipians 4:8
Christian brothers, keep your minds thinking about whatever is true, whatever is respected, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever can be loved, and whatever is well thought of. If there is anything good and worth giving thanks for, think about these things. (NLV).

As I meditated on this and began my Friday, it occurred to me that we are often taught from a very young age that we are here to love God, love others, serve others and many times "WE" get lost in translation.  However, when God created in the beginning, including creating us...did He not say this is Good?  So when we are encouraged to think on what is right, pure, anything good and worth giving thanks for, should we not also include us (yes YOURSELF) in that list?  I think YES, YES and YES!!!  I believe there needs to be a delicate balance in how we live daily.  A balance between loving and nurturing yourself, so that you can in turn love, help, pray for, encourage and yes serve others.  No matter how much we want to, it is not healthy for us to attempt to give from an empty vessel.  Just look around you, there are way too many examples of neglect, abuse, depression etc. If you trace many of these sadnesses and devastating situations in families, I bet you would find hurting and devastated people who did not take time to heal and nurture their inner child and started families, friendships and marriages that drained an already empty vessel and at some point bad turned to worse.  They meant well and often never even slowed down long enough to see the worse coming.  That being said, today 10/12/12, I want to encourage you and me to remember...Sometimes U have to Choose U...it is ok and does not mean you are self centered, selfish or a stone cold trip (does anyone still say that?).  What it means is that you were created to be all that He had in mind for you, but to Be who you are destined to be, you need to Nurture you...take care of you and replenish you.  The awesome thing about choosing you, is that it will cause a glow in you that will shine and draw others in and cause them to desire to live a little lighter, laugh a little more, love a little deeper and Give Thanks for and to the God who created us all...and that type of Love and attitude of Gratitude is what will CHANGE THE WORLD!!!

The Power of Encouragement!

Sometimes, every now and again, we all will come to a place where we will either be in need of an encouraging word, hug, smile or will be a deliverer of one or more of the above.  Life is said to be an adventure and we are pushed to Ride the Wave!!!  In all well written adventure tales, there should be excitement, anticipation, disappointments, moments of waiting, captivity, escape and VICTORIOUS Endings!!! What makes the adventure worth while is a person's attitude, determination, love, faith, hope and joy for the journey.  I look around and see all kinds of things occurring in my life and the lives of friends and loved ones.  Births, graduations, illness, bankruptcy, divorce, marriage, love found, love lost, self discovery, losing homes, buying new homes and even death.  It is said, in this life we are sure to have trials and tribulations and it is important to learn to be grateful for it all, remembering that all things work together to create a Divine Design that could not be birthed if everything at all times was all good.  There is a timing that may not seem like perfect timing to you, but is indeed the Divine Right time for the precious and challenging moments that make up the tapestry of our lives.  As we experience this life, overcoming the seemingly dream threatening ups and downs, remember to take some time to engage in the Power of Encouragement!!  It will revive you, renew you and center you.  It truly will inspire you to continue to Ride the Waves of life, to keep on keeping on.  Encourage somebody today and start with lovingly encouraging yourself...Muah!

For This Purpose!

Breathe in Breathe out

In a spirit of gratitude, acknowledge yourself as one of God’s masterpieces

And do not be ashamed

You are treasured above all of

His creations..in you He placed bits of heaven & pieces of dreams

Cherish and preserve what God has blessed

To honor yourself and love others

*For this purpose you were created*

What is "Normal" AnyWay?

Normal or should I say, the idea of "Normal" is extremely overrated!! Coming from different backgrounds & different life experiences gives an assortment of supportable defintions to the much used term "Normal".  People have a tendancy to harshly judge others and will argue up and down allday long about what their idea of normal is. 

Is buying a Flawlessly beautiful motorcycle and riding the wave with you new motorcycle riding friends, after the vibrant age of 35 (ok 25, ya'll know how that goes), while raising AWESOME children considered normal?  Is traveling the world on a budget when some would dare say, you should wait until you're married before going THOSE PLACES and doing those things, considered normal?  How about going to the Drive-In (yes some still exist) in your favorite cozy footie pajamas just for the fun of it, considered normal?  You get my drift right? 

Perhaps the "World's" narrow idea of normal is for people (meaning us striving to live an abundant and purposeful life) to not have any eyebrow raising moments/nothing that sticks out.  Perhaps it is far more comfy for the majority, if we act like robots walking the earth without any sudden AHA moments.  Not reminding them of how much they maybe settling instead of Living!  When someone dares to think something or do something outside of the mundane "Ordinary" (robots moving in unison) or not their idea of "Christian" (you know how we do), they are pegged as "Not Normal".  However, at the end of the day, who can honestly say What Is "Normal" AnyWay?  Our purpose on this earth (in my opinion) is to Love yourself and others as Christ loves us (try it without Him..I triple dog dare you...Impossible), to live an abundant life (which is kind of hard while trying to fit into other's ideas of normal), to Love God with your whole heart/mind, body and spirit & Enjoy lots of laughter (not at other's expense) for it is indeed Good for the Soul!

                               

Forgiven

 

Forgiveness is giving love when there is no reason...

 

What is planted in the heart, takes root in the soul....

 

In the quietness of the dawn, shines a new day,

a new beginning and new compassions

 

Forgiveness washes over me like a healing oil, a balm in Gilead

 

In humility I admit my wrongs, no other way to move forward

 

Thankful for the opportunity to forgive and be forgiven

For out of this act love can prosper and friendship can take root and grow

 

His Spirit and His word light the right path

A path clear of yesterday's obstacles and paved with a

sense of wonder, awe and an open heart

 

The Beauty of a New Dawn is simply Wonderful!

 

Who is your Hero?

Do you realize that as you go about your daily routine, working, going to school, caring for your family, pursuing your passions and your dreams, that people are watching you?  You may feel like your going in circles, doing the same thing day after day and getting nowhere, but know there are still people observing you. They are respecting your efforts and the progress you are indeed making but sadly are not able to see yourself.  It seems that many times it is a major challenge for US to see our own SUPER HERO capes (brilliant in color) flying in the wind due to the fact that it is  socially more acceptable, encouraged and reinforced thru commercials and the media to look outside ourselves to find our heroes.   What would happen if we taught our children from birth, the importance of BEING their OWN HERO?  If we raised them to be someone they could admire and respect?  How about AWESOME & AMAZING young adults we would be releasing into the world?  Yes, Yes and Yes!!! Let's take a little challenge.  Think about your personal heroes, those people who you not only respect but also somewhat admire.  Take a clean sheet of paper and write down the following:
1) Their Names
2) The things about your heroes that you admire
3)Things you admire about yourself (Please Do Not Skip This Part of the Challenge)
4)Review #3 Again and if it is blank, take some time and come back to it. 
5)If you truly have nothing for #3, it's ok.  Now comes the adventure!  Set out to re-create a YOU that you could look up to (Your Own Hero)!!

Who is your Hero?  Remember, it is never ever to late for the answer to be...Me, Myself and I.

                                   

Want Change? Invest Time in your Children

I have come to believe that society has fooled many women, and some men, into believing that the true measure of success is how big your house is, how new your car is and how many vacations you take each year. Sure people expect you to get married and have your 2.5 children but no one really expects you to actually raise them yourself. The conventional school of thought is to find the best child care available and as soon as you give birth you must shrink back down your pre-baby size and get back in the work force. While I have no problem with women working outside of the home I do have a problem with a society that requires it of its women.

I am the proud mother of a one year old and I love her to pieces. It took a few failed pregnancies, the loss of a Fallopian tube and 3 months of bed rest  before she graced us with her presence. Like any modern American woman I found the best daycare I could find for her and when she was 11 weeks old we put her in daycare. It wasn't as hard for me to leave her there for 40 hours a week because I had convinced myself that this is the way it had to be. However every week I began to resent going to work while these other people had the chance to mold my daughters mind and personality.

As she got older she became smarter and had learned some sign language and other great things but she also was picking up some habits that I didn't care for like having full on lay on the ground tantrums and, because a child had bitten her a few times, she started biting. Now I'm sure these are things that most children experience but I know that these were learned behaviors instead of just personality quarks inherent to her because one day she wasn't doing these things and after I observed another student exhibiting these behaviors a few days later so was my sweetie.

Well as fate would have it I was laid off from my job of nearly ten years with a lovely severance package and now I was going to be a work from home mom (I also have a home based business). The idea was liberating. Now I could instill all of the values that I wanted my child to have and have a chance to be the type of wife I never had the time to be before (dinner on the table, clean house, laundry done, etc.). Well those first few weeks I fell into a bit of a depression and I couldn't figure out why. Then one day it hit me. I had been working for someone else for over half of my life and I had lost my sense of purpose without a job. Sure raising my daughter full time is a great purpose but did I really know what I was doing? Was I really qualified to teach her numbers and shapes? Would she get the socialization that she would need to continue to be ahead of the curve mentally?

Once I realized that these things were just lies that women have been told for many years I shook off that fear and took on the challenge of making sure that my daughter would not only thrive but enjoy our time together every day. I created a routine for her, established and enforced a nap time daily, starting next month we will be taking a mommy and me dance class and going to free library story time and a drop in play time at our local community center. She is learning shapes, numbers and letters and loves to dance and sing. I am so blessed to have a husband who supports me and to have my home based business that gives me the adult interaction that I need to still feel like I'm a part of society.

While I know that not every woman can or wants to be a full time parent I think that it is important that we start to redefine what parenting looks like and make our children a priority again. I fully believe that a large part of the reason we have so many issues with young people today is because there are too many other things that are being held in higher esteem then our children. If we want our children to thrive then we must find a way to make them more of a priority then we have been. Otherwise things will never change.

                            

Sparkle & Shine, is it in Divine Order?

Sometimes we try to move ahead of God's timing, not realizing or even at times simply forgetting (because we are so determined to have it OUR WAY right now) that God has the hook-up and all the right connections. 
When He delays a thing, Our plans or Our desires, it would behoove us to remember that our Daddy (who sits in heavenly places) does not dwell in foolishness and He ain't gone bless no mess.  No matter how much we throw temper tantrums (and ya'll know we still do..don't play) and pout, God still desires to set things up for us and get them in their proper place.  When we, in our only child state of mind (I am one so that gives me a few rights to say that..please do NOT be offended) decide I want it NOW NOW NOW and choose not to wait on God, trust messiness is on the horizon.  When I say wait on God, this does not mean sitting like a bump on a log with your hands folded in prayer.  Waiting on God is an action word, yes it is a verb which means to be actively doing what God has placed in your heart to do at that time.  It could be just being still (so you can recognize that He is God and is working on your behalf behind the scenes), taking care of an aging or sickly loved one, Forgiving (this is a BIGGIE), paying your tithes (when you feel you don't have nothing so how r you gonna give the CHURCH something), and so many other ways that He desires to use us while He is working on us. As I was saying, when we choose to not wait, we can really mess up some stuff.  Think about a large beautiful home at Christmas, all aglow with sparkling lights exquisitely placed.  Now picture all those lights hurriedly removed, balled up and thrown in a box on New Year's Day in a tangled mess.  When the time comes again for those lights to be displayed and enjoyed, imagine the time that will now be wasted trying to detangle each string of lights simply because the time was not taken to de-light the tree and put them away in an orderly fashion.  As you are frustratingly doing this time consuming job, hoping the lights still work, you will promise yourself yet again that this year you will do it neatly (lol).  After all is said and done, I hope we will begin to take the time to do things in decency and in order, so that when our time comes to Sparkle and Shine, everything will work and flow in it's Divine Order.

                                                

You Can Do It!!

Goal setting is something that has always and I do mean ALWAYS, intimidated me.  The fear of failure is a wild beast that will keep you where you are and far far away from where you really in your heart of hearts desire to be.  The interesting, funny thing is that all it really takes is one tiny step forward to make your dreams become a reality (okay well maybe not every single dream).  That first step maybe looking up a class schedule online to check tuition pricing, drinking more water (so you eat less), purchasing pencils (or pens which I prefer to journal with) and a GORGEOUS journal (from the few actual book stores that still exist, they are disappearing fast thanks to E-Readers), updating your resume, or even just making a phone call no excuses.  Many of us use excuses as reasons why we can't, while others CHOOSE to use their life's experiences as motivation to better themselves so they will be in the right position when greater opportunities come along.  Setting a goal gives you power believe it or not.  As you inch toward your goal, whatever it maybe, you will learn lots and lots of stuff about yourself and the world around you.  You should learn (had to say should because you know everyone is a wee bit different) what is working and what is not working in your life that is either propelling you at hyper speed toward your goal, slowing you down or downright blocking your path.  You may even learn that some relationships, no matter how bad you want them, may not  be able to travel with you where your dreams are taking you (often a  very hard truth).  You may also discover that the very thing that you thought IMPOSSIBLE, is soooooo doable and that doggone it, You Really Can Do It!!!!  How is that for amazing?  So shake a tail feather, get laser focused, get determined and go get it, go get the LIFE YOU WERE CREATED TO LIVE!

                                             

Just The Way You Are

Before the beginning of time, thoughts of you filled God's mind.  He is indeed your BIGGEST FAN!  In a field full of beautiful flowers, He showers you with these loving thoughts:

There are things that are uniquely sweet and wonderful about every aspect of your petals.  Your very essence is a Savory & Intoxicating fragrance to the man whom God carefully and lovingly chooses for you.  He will be drawn to your Vibrant Colors, delicate aroma and creative design.  He will be honored to walk day by day at your side on this adventurous journey called Life.

Remember this as you are traveling along, Riding The Wave and seeing the cool sights in your season of singleness, that the one that was designed Just for you will indeed be drawn to you Just The Way You Are.

                                          

Relax & Stop All That Foot Shufflin'

Today I was reminded that God wants us (every single one of us) to pursue Him diligently with all our heart, soul and mind.  As we chase after Him (He will become closer to us and we will fall in love with Him...He's a GREAT CATCH).  Our thoughts and ways will become more and more like His thoughts and ways, which is perfect since He desires that His plans for us become our dreams for ourselves.  He promises to grant us the desires of our hearts but first He wants to inspire our heart's desires.  What is fascinating to me, is as we pursure our God inspired dreams, it will bring about a peace and joy that the world didn't give and the world can not take away.  But rest assured, some folks will surely try!  This is when we HAVE to be unmoveable, determined and full of bliss.  Let our footsteps (actions) be inspired steps and not just foot shufflin' activity.  Foot shufflin' activity is rooted in disbelief and lack of faith (you are shuffling trying to make your dreams come true) it feels hard and is not pleasurable.  When your steps are inspired, there is a joy and peace about it.  You BELIEVE that you are doing what you were created in that moment to do and you are allowing God to order your steps according to His word and impeccable plan for your life.  Soooo I encourage you to Relax and Stop all that foot shufflin'.  There is a plan, ask to see the blueprint and let peace, joy and fun be your guide to fulfilling your dreams.  I triple dog dare you!!

                                         

Life Isn't Always Fair

Striving daily to live right, but people can tick you off sometimes and make you think thangs you KNOW GOOD AND WELL that if you act on them, only the blood of Jesus can make things right!  The more you think on it, the more you will convince yourself that what THEY said to you or what THEY did to you (or to your loved ones/especially your children) was sooooo not fair.  The more you will think to yourself that you are justified in.......(fill in the blank).  This is when HOPEFULLY, from somewhere inside you not so far away, you will be reminded that this battle is not yours to fight and vengeance is mine sayeth the Lord.  Cast all your cares on Him because He cares deeply (believe it and repeat it to yourself until you do believe it) for YOU.  He allows certain things that don't feel good or make sense, to happen in our lives for many different reasons and because his thoughts and ways are not like our thoughts and ways, we won't always understand His reasons.  Just know this truth, His love NEVER EVER FAILS and His timing is perfect.  He loves you, supports you and wants only the very best for you.  When we plot and plan to get even with those we feel have wronged us either in word (attacking their character to others on the phone, Facebook, Twitter etc.) or in action, it contradicts what God has in store and beautifully planned for us (Jeremiah 29:11).  Soooooo, Yes Life Isn't Always Fair but if you let God have HIS way (let Him drive, I mean for real for real drive) the journey will be worth it! 

                                                          

I Choose

Today I was thinking to myself (don't act like you're shocked..I do that quite often) how interesting it is the standards we use or qualities we sometimes look for when choosing our friends and sometimes our boo.  We tend to put importance on the strangest things.  Some of those things include: Skin Color (light vs dark), Hair length (long preferred and wavy/curly), Height (tall vs short), Educational background (no degree..you can't talk me), Career (doctor, lawyer, engineer...think "Daddy's Little Girls"), and even how much they are willing to sneak, lie or cheat all in the name of having a little fun. 

Okay, okay, I know your eyebrows are raised and you are SYH (shaking your head) but hear me out.  Sometimes we will not consider befriending or better yet putting in the energy to sustain an existing friendship because a person is EVOLVING.  They get married, have kids, no longer work where we work or fall on financial hard times, stop drinking, stop getting high and the like.  Perhaps they start walking a more spiritual path (and no that is not the same as becoming religious and judgemental). 

What if, we (me included) thought to ourselves...hmmm today I will choose this person or that person to be a part of my day, my circle of friends, my social network or my world because their CHARACTER shines entirely to bright to be ignored?  To choose those who actively understand that verbal fun and intelligent conversation(not texting) is indeed a lost art form.  Choosing those who can embrace our growth (intellectual and spiritual) because they too are continually growing.  Try searching with your heart's eye (prayerfully) for those who think before they speak and feel it is important to be impeccable with their word (whether dealing with adults or children).  People who find joy in at least a few of life's SIMPLE pleasures and have creative non-agressive ways of handling stress, disappointments and the fun ups and downs that life is sure to bring our way. 

Simply said, be careful who you allow in your castle because after all it is your little slice of heaven.  Invite those in who are striving (like you and me) to be the best they can be. 

"LIVE", Don't Beat Around the Bush

Today was one of those days, ya know what I mean?  Started out pretty good, I heard some inspiring words on the radio and felt I was ready to be productive and let my little light shine (HA).  The day (oh infamous Hump Day") gave me a run for my money. 

Wednesday began for me, with the Yolanda Adams morning show.  The word was in a nut shell, LIVE and LIVE LIFE MORE ABUNDANTLY!!!  In listening to this short message from Yolonda's (not sure which is the proper way to spell her name and truthfully to tired to look it up) co-workers, I gained the following insight:  If you struggle in believing that you were lovingly, fearfully and wonderfully created to live life and live it more abundantly, then try reading His word to get evidence and believing His word and in His revelations to gain confidence.  Pumped up on this message I set out to drink in the day, because after all life is all around us right?  It's in the color and sounds of the trees, the fragrance of summer's flowers, the hypnotic beats of your favorite songs, a preacher preachin' and a teacher teachin'. 
Work was hectic, but with some mental determination and good old Mountain Dew, I survived the challenge  =).  I had plans, oh some wonderful plans to listen to some FREE live jazz after work BUT, those plans were quickly thwarted by a slow computer (could not log off my super special work computer..grrrrrrr) and a very very flat tire on my car.  As I looked at my car, deep breaths keeping me from screaming at the top of my lungs, I tried to think, WHY OH WHY TODAY???  I had to stop for a moment though and thank God for His perfect timing.  My tire went flat at work and not on I-94 while going 75 miles per hour and for placing awesome co-workers in my life who came to my rescue (you know who you are).  As my car was being fixed, the winds gently blowing (one of the nicest summer evenings we have experienced here in Michigan in a while) and the conversation so nice and relaxing, all I could do is say...living la vida loca and laugh to myself. It was challenging, frustrating but very enjoyable all within a 1 1/2 hour span. 

I didn't want a flat tire, nor a slow computer, or to put my co-workers out but as for me I can truly say I drank in my day fully.  Today I lived life with all it's curves and I did not beat around the bush (I did the doggone thang).  In doing so, I enjoyed myself and am thankful for the summer breeze on this infamous "Hump Day".

A Matter of Perspective

We deal with each other (our fellow humans) day in and day out.  These personal interactions can be fun, challenging, lovely, exciting, draining, intense, unforgettable, regrettable, fulfilling and so much more.  We learn from them, sometimes lessons that hurt for days and sometimes even years after the close encounter of a strange kind (LOL) has come and gone.  What I have learned is that the 
people we meet, have experienced a variety of struggles, troubles, hurts, joys and disappointments before you ever even entered their world.  That being said, when these close encounters skip your way and challenge you please remember the ups and downs of life that have formed the particular person you have chosen to talk to, listen to, like, love etc. many times has ABSOLUTELY nothing to do with you!  Soooo don't think for one minute you are a trash collector or a storage unit.  What I am trying to say, in a strange way, so please walk with me here.  Don't allow yourself (you are fearfully and wonderfully made and deserve nothing less than the best that God has for you) to take their trash (issues) or their emotional baggage personally.  You were never created to be someone else's trash dumpster or their emotional baggage storage unit.  Did you follow all of that?  What is in their best interest and your own is to pray (not speak badly to or about them) for them and let them work thru and sort out all this stuff with God (who also loves them probably more than they could ever imagine).  After all is said and done, that is God's job and His territory (He is available for counseling 24 hours a day and it is pretty much free of charge).  He is extremely good at what HE does I might add.  His opinion and advice is not slanted and has only that person's best interest at heart (now that's Love). 

Relationships are a natural part of life and learning to have healthy ones are partially knowledge, desire and largely a matter of perspective.  Walking with and loving people right smack dab where they are is vital.  Keep in mind that the old saying is true, people enter our lives sometimes for a reason, perhaps for a particular season and at times for a life time.  Your perspective in dealing with them can remind you that not all people can have a front row seat in your life, sometimes you have to love them from a distance and that too is ok. 


 
The fastest way to become the Master of your thoughts and emotions is through challenging situations.  If your life is going along fairly smoothly, there are not the same opportunities that enable you to strengthen your power and become the master of your thoughts and emotions.

You see, even challenges are beautiful opportunities in disguise.

                                                                               Rhonda Byrne-The Secret