Tuesday, August 16, 2022

Mangled Spaghetti

    It began many moons ago as a great release, encourager, and a pathway to self-reflection

Book after book, video after darn video, article after article...yeah I ain't mad but man I've digested a lot, perhaps too much! 

I read, I listened, I dissected and wrote...I paused (well sort of) and then I pressed the repeat button

I thought that is how it was SUPPOSED to be done, this healing piece

However, tonight I sit in the midst of all the thoughts and all the feels, and it feels like I've created a big crazy bowl of mangled spaghetti in my own head! And darn it, I don't know what in the world to do about it, ugh grrrr!!!

    After all this time, shouldn't I have a make myself feel better remedy, some quote or song or affirmation to make me feel cool, calm and whole?

I sat quietly for a long, long, long time...ok well 10 minutes and tried my hardest to fix it and unravel the noodled mess, but yep, they are still there

I scrolled the social media rooms, in hopes that the cure all would pop up on a timeline somehow or someway...no luck 

    I listened to "Black Butterfly" over and over and over and over again and that helped a bit...true story

I rubbed my dog, showered off the day, sat in my sacred garden and that helped a little

Then, I text my energy coach, surely, she could fix it...no response

Then a thought, mystical and quiet, crept into my head space...perhaps there is no fix (Ms Fix It)! Perhaps, sometimes feelings and mangled spaghetti just happen, and you just sit with it, yup give yourself some loving space to just be uncomfortable in it and know it is not something you control or fix and make disappear. And so, I did and am... just sitting in my kitchen with a head full of mangled spaghetti and surprisingly, it is okay. 



Saturday, January 1, 2022

Flow

As 2021 was nearing a close I craved to be near a moving body of water. I was not interested in a pond, nope, I wanted a lake or river that extended for miles and miles. I thought about hitting the highway and going to the Detroit River, but that didn't happen. On New Year's Day I pondered going to take in the Belleville Lake, but again i just didn't make it. Fed up with my ownself I hopped in my car and headed to Ypsilanti's Riverside park to listen to the sounds of the Huron River. 


The sounds of flowing water greeted me immediately and called me closer. I watched and listened as the water flowed soothingly and calmly before encountering obstacles like large tree branches (that had found their way into the water's path). It was fascinating to observe how the water moved differently while moving over, under and around the tree branches and rocks, it was no longer a smooth flow but more of a bubbling climb. After it passed over and around these momentary snags, it slowed around a mini island before continuing on to it's calm journey. As I took this beautiful nature lesson in I was reminded how similar this is to life. We enjoy the happy and easy steps we are able to take day in and month out, however our character is not grafted during those times. When challenges, obstacles or setbacks show up...it is during those times that we learn how to breath and flow through, over and around them that the richness of our character and purpose often begins to manifest. 

Learning, yes learning, to flow in challenging times allows us to see how much the divine is present and needed in our everyday living. The calm waters were quiet and so peaceful. The roar of the water was present under the bridge and where the biggest tree branches existed. Our inner peaceful warrior is born, not in our calm peaceful places but during the learning spaces. As we learn how to be present and flow when faced with challenges we may be surprised to experience our most impactful moments arise. 



Learning to flow is a process of unlearning the habit of always being in hustle or fight mode. Sometimes the universe wants us to simply tune in, show up and follow it's divine nudgings. The more you allow yourself to get acquainted with the not knowing the outcome or forcing the outcome, it becomes a bit easier to tune in to the quiet whispers that are always present within. I hope as you embark on this next 30 days, 6 months, 5 years etc...you will consider what would learning to flow look like for you and how could it serve you? 

Hmmmm...


Monday, November 8, 2021

Community Stand Up!

 People, we are a very fascinating species. We are full of contradictions. 

On the one hand we are keeping it 100 and on the other we are terrified to give 50% of our authentic selves to others.

We have this tough unbendable outer shell yet we are traumatized scared children on the inside that crave belonging.

We share our innermost angers on social media platforms but find it challenging to be vulnerable and have intimate conversations with our partners, children and parents.

We are quick to say what we absolutely don't have time for: fuckery, bullshit, disrespect, haters, new friends! Yet, we find it almost impossible to surrender to having time for the things that would possibly serve us well: Mental health check ups, forgiveness, reading, investing in true holistic healing, investing in our future better selves, time away from social media and other toxic behaviors.

Many of us are hurting in ways that we don't even recognize, we need to be reminded that we are valued, needed, enough, and so very loved and seen. 

We are in need of a nurturing and uplifting Village. 

We need our Community to Stand Up!





Sunday, May 9, 2021

Sometimes Celebrating Looks Like This

Mother's Day is today and there will be brunches and lunches,

there maybe flowers and gifts delivered

there may even be road trips taken and airline tickets purchased...because today is a big big day for many!


But Sometimes, there are cards from years gone by that are read over and over,

Sometimes, there are tears that flow and don't seem to have an end in sight

Sometimes, there are movies that are watched or songs that are played because of the memories that go along with them

Sometimes, there is cooking or cleaning and sometimes there's not

Sometimes it's reading a book

Sometimes there is staying in bed all day because you just can't today 

Sometimes there is working

Sometimes there are walks in the park

Sometimes there is turning off you're phone

Sometimes there is hugging someone tightly that loves you dearly

Sometimes there is laughter and sometimes there's not

Sometimes it is going to your place of worship

Sometimes it is cuddling up with your dog or cat and sometimes it's not

Sometimes Mother's Day is just another day and Sometimes it is an absolutely amazing one!

However this day in May plays out for you and for me, how we choose to celebrate or not to... just know it is OKAY...it is absolutely OKAY!




Thursday, February 4, 2021

The Table-Reflections

 

We all come to the table with stuff
Hopes, disappointments, snapshots from InstaBook and a desire to have the good life
The table is our friendships and our relationships

I ask: What is being served at the table? Is it edifying for the body and nourishment for the soul?

Does magic fill you to overflowing and call you to your higher self, your naughty self, your free self, your true self?

Again I ponder: What is being served at the table? Is it edifying for the body and nourishment for the soul?

Does it ground you, balance you, lift you, and walk beside you? Does it give, take and listen with the intention to understand you?

Suddenly I hear...Respect is being served and Love is being served!
I answer: At this table I will sit and at this table heartily I will eat.


Sunday, November 22, 2020

The Way We Were

Could it be that it was all so simple then

or does Social Media plant pictures in my mind

Facebook memories fill the corners i tried to leave behind

If I had the chance to do it all again...would I?

Not knowing what I know now

I'll just glance back every now and then

Allow Facebook to hum it's precious lies

And simply remember the laughter and the way we were 


Wednesday, June 24, 2020

Juneteenth Celebration of Our Liberation!

This year wasn't  the first year but it was my first year celebrating, I mean for real for real celebrating Juneteenth

I've read about it, respected its meaning and kept on living. However, this year in the midst of the horrific scene that played out for all the world to see (the murder of Mr. George Floyd), the quarantine due to Covid-19, and the protest taking place all over the globe...this year 2020 was different.

I felt the need to understand how stuff in this world worked a little more, like politics. I wanted to dig a bit deeper into our history and feel more connected to people who looked like me. I no longer wanted to just peek in the window of my heritage, I wanted to begin to embrace it more fully.




I attended a small but life changing Junteenth Tailgate and enjoyed beautiful people of all shades of brown, different backgrounds, beef hot dogs and great music. The Four Black Ladies from Sugarbrook took me on a journey that felt like a true celebration of our liberation! It felt like a family reunion with afros and dishekis, only we wore t-shirts full of red, black and green and every hairstyle under the bright sun. We talked, we laughed, we danced, and we connected. As I prepared to leave I realized I wanted more of this, this feeling of Community and I now realize, it's what we all need more than we know.