Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Who is your Hero?

Do you realize that as you go about your daily routine, working, going to school, caring for your family, pursuing your passions and your dreams, that people are watching you?  You may feel like your going in circles, doing the same thing day after day and getting nowhere, but know there are still people observing you. They are respecting your efforts and the progress you are indeed making but sadly are not able to see yourself.  It seems that many times it is a major challenge for US to see our own SUPER HERO capes (brilliant in color) flying in the wind due to the fact that it is  socially more acceptable, encouraged and reinforced thru commercials and the media to look outside ourselves to find our heroes.   What would happen if we taught our children from birth, the importance of BEING their OWN HERO?  If we raised them to be someone they could admire and respect?  How about AWESOME & AMAZING young adults we would be releasing into the world?  Yes, Yes and Yes!!! Let's take a little challenge.  Think about your personal heroes, those people who you not only respect but also somewhat admire.  Take a clean sheet of paper and write down the following:
1) Their Names
2) The things about your heroes that you admire
3)Things you admire about yourself (Please Do Not Skip This Part of the Challenge)
4)Review #3 Again and if it is blank, take some time and come back to it. 
5)If you truly have nothing for #3, it's ok.  Now comes the adventure!  Set out to re-create a YOU that you could look up to (Your Own Hero)!!

Who is your Hero?  Remember, it is never ever to late for the answer to be...Me, Myself and I.


Friday, August 24, 2012

Want Change? Invest Time in your Children

I have come to believe that society has fooled many women, and some men, into believing that the true measure of success is how big your house is, how new your car is and how many vacations you take each year. Sure people expect you to get married and have your 2.5 children but no one really expects you to actually raise them yourself. The conventional school of thought is to find the best child care available and as soon as you give birth you must shrink back down your pre-baby size and get back in the work force. While I have no problem with women working outside of the home I do have a problem with a society that requires it of its women.

I am the proud mother of a one year old and I love her to pieces. It took a few failed pregnancies, the loss of a Fallopian tube and 3 months of bed rest  before she graced us with her presence. Like any modern American woman I found the best daycare I could find for her and when she was 11 weeks old we put her in daycare. It wasn't as hard for me to leave her there for 40 hours a week because I had convinced myself that this is the way it had to be. However every week I began to resent going to work while these other people had the chance to mold my daughters mind and personality.

As she got older she became smarter and had learned some sign language and other great things but she also was picking up some habits that I didn't care for like having full on lay on the ground tantrums and, because a child had bitten her a few times, she started biting. Now I'm sure these are things that most children experience but I know that these were learned behaviors instead of just personality quarks inherent to her because one day she wasn't doing these things and after I observed another student exhibiting these behaviors a few days later so was my sweetie.

Well as fate would have it I was laid off from my job of nearly ten years with a lovely severance package and now I was going to be a work from home mom (I also have a home based business). The idea was liberating. Now I could instill all of the values that I wanted my child to have and have a chance to be the type of wife I never had the time to be before (dinner on the table, clean house, laundry done, etc.). Well those first few weeks I fell into a bit of a depression and I couldn't figure out why. Then one day it hit me. I had been working for someone else for over half of my life and I had lost my sense of purpose without a job. Sure raising my daughter full time is a great purpose but did I really know what I was doing? Was I really qualified to teach her numbers and shapes? Would she get the socialization that she would need to continue to be ahead of the curve mentally?

Once I realized that these things were just lies that women have been told for many years I shook off that fear and took on the challenge of making sure that my daughter would not only thrive but enjoy our time together every day. I created a routine for her, established and enforced a nap time daily, starting next month we will be taking a mommy and me dance class and going to free library story time and a drop in play time at our local community center. She is learning shapes, numbers and letters and loves to dance and sing. I am so blessed to have a husband who supports me and to have my home based business that gives me the adult interaction that I need to still feel like I'm a part of society.

While I know that not every woman can or wants to be a full time parent I think that it is important that we start to redefine what parenting looks like and make our children a priority again. I fully believe that a large part of the reason we have so many issues with young people today is because there are too many other things that are being held in higher esteem then our children. If we want our children to thrive then we must find a way to make them more of a priority then we have been. Otherwise things will never change.


Friday, August 17, 2012

Sparkle & Shine, is it in Divine Order?

Sometimes we try to move ahead of God's timing, not realizing or even at times simply forgetting (because we are so determined to have it OUR WAY right now) that God has the hook-up and all the right connections. 
When He delays a thing, Our plans or Our desires, it would behoove us to remember that our Daddy (who sits in heavenly places) does not dwell in foolishness and He ain't gone bless no mess.  No matter how much we throw temper tantrums (and ya'll know we still do..don't play) and pout, God still desires to set things up for us and get them in their proper place.  When we, in our only child state of mind (I am one so that gives me a few rights to say that..please do NOT be offended) decide I want it NOW NOW NOW and choose not to wait on God, trust messiness is on the horizon.  When I say wait on God, this does not mean sitting like a bump on a log with your hands folded in prayer.  Waiting on God is an action word, yes it is a verb which means to be actively doing what God has placed in your heart to do at that time.  It could be just being still (so you can recognize that He is God and is working on your behalf behind the scenes), taking care of an aging or sickly loved one, Forgiving (this is a BIGGIE), paying your tithes (when you feel you don't have nothing so how r you gonna give the CHURCH something), and so many other ways that He desires to use us while He is working on us. As I was saying, when we choose to not wait, we can really mess up some stuff.  Think about a large beautiful home at Christmas, all aglow with sparkling lights exquisitely placed.  Now picture all those lights hurriedly removed, balled up and thrown in a box on New Year's Day in a tangled mess.  When the time comes again for those lights to be displayed and enjoyed, imagine the time that will now be wasted trying to detangle each string of lights simply because the time was not taken to de-light the tree and put them away in an orderly fashion.  As you are frustratingly doing this time consuming job, hoping the lights still work, you will promise yourself yet again that this year you will do it neatly (lol).  After all is said and done, I hope we will begin to take the time to do things in decency and in order, so that when our time comes to Sparkle and Shine, everything will work and flow in it's Divine Order.


Friday, August 10, 2012

You Can Do It!!

Goal setting is something that has always and I do mean ALWAYS, intimidated me.  The fear of failure is a wild beast that will keep you where you are and far far away from where you really in your heart of hearts desire to be.  The interesting, funny thing is that all it really takes is one tiny step forward to make your dreams become a reality (okay well maybe not every single dream).  That first step maybe looking up a class schedule online to check tuition pricing, drinking more water (so you eat less), purchasing pencils (or pens which I prefer to journal with) and a GORGEOUS journal (from the few actual book stores that still exist, they are disappearing fast thanks to E-Readers), updating your resume, or even just making a phone call no excuses.  Many of us use excuses as reasons why we can't, while others CHOOSE to use their life's experiences as motivation to better themselves so they will be in the right position when greater opportunities come along.  Setting a goal gives you power believe it or not.  As you inch toward your goal, whatever it maybe, you will learn lots and lots of stuff about yourself and the world around you.  You should learn (had to say should because you know everyone is a wee bit different) what is working and what is not working in your life that is either propelling you at hyper speed toward your goal, slowing you down or downright blocking your path.  You may even learn that some relationships, no matter how bad you want them, may not  be able to travel with you where your dreams are taking you (often a  very hard truth).  You may also discover that the very thing that you thought IMPOSSIBLE, is soooooo doable and that doggone it, You Really Can Do It!!!!  How is that for amazing?  So shake a tail feather, get laser focused, get determined and go get it, go get the LIFE YOU WERE CREATED TO LIVE!


Sunday, August 5, 2012

Just The Way You Are

Before the beginning of time, thoughts of you filled God's mind.  He is indeed your BIGGEST FAN!  In a field full of beautiful flowers, He showers you with these loving thoughts:

There are things that are uniquely sweet and wonderful about every aspect of your petals.  Your very essence is a Savory & Intoxicating fragrance to the man whom God carefully and lovingly chooses for you.  He will be drawn to your Vibrant Colors, delicate aroma and creative design.  He will be honored to walk day by day at your side on this adventurous journey called Life.

Remember this as you are traveling along, Riding The Wave and seeing the cool sights in your season of singleness, that the one that was designed Just for you will indeed be drawn to you Just The Way You Are.


Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Relax & Stop All That Foot Shufflin'

Today I was reminded that God wants us (every single one of us) to pursue Him diligently with all our heart, soul and mind.  As we chase after Him (He will become closer to us and we will fall in love with Him...He's a GREAT CATCH).  Our thoughts and ways will become more and more like His thoughts and ways, which is perfect since He desires that His plans for us become our dreams for ourselves.  He promises to grant us the desires of our hearts but first He wants to inspire our heart's desires.  What is fascinating to me, is as we pursure our God inspired dreams, it will bring about a peace and joy that the world didn't give and the world can not take away.  But rest assured, some folks will surely try!  This is when we HAVE to be unmoveable, determined and full of bliss.  Let our footsteps (actions) be inspired steps and not just foot shufflin' activity.  Foot shufflin' activity is rooted in disbelief and lack of faith (you are shuffling trying to make your dreams come true) it feels hard and is not pleasurable.  When your steps are inspired, there is a joy and peace about it.  You BELIEVE that you are doing what you were created in that moment to do and you are allowing God to order your steps according to His word and impeccable plan for your life.  Soooo I encourage you to Relax and Stop all that foot shufflin'.  There is a plan, ask to see the blueprint and let peace, joy and fun be your guide to fulfilling your dreams.  I triple dog dare you!!